Do not regret what you have done.:
This is a hard one, but a fantastic achievement for those who can do it. As you train, and your moral standards raise, you look back in embarassment.
Even if it wasn’t your deed, but one done to you, so many feel the shame. What you are doing, is remaking the event again and again. What is worse, is that you are remembering something that didn’t even happen!
That takes some explanation. You remember an event, but if that event had been recorded, you probably wouldn’t even recognize it. You certainly wouldn’t feel guilty or shamed by it.
But you have made this into your home position. Part of you wants to roll in this emotional shit and then eat it.
Stop. You are here now, the hand is dealt, play it as best you can.